At some point in life, everyone has or will experience the pain of a broken heart.
Heart break can feel overwhelmingly dreadful.
It’s a pain that seems to go unnoticed.
It’s the place where mental distress meets physical pain. It has the power to literally manifests physical symptoms beyond compare.
Some even describe the symptoms as the feeling of an oncoming heart attack.
It’s a pain which I personally have experienced in my own life and felt helpless to do anything about. It seemed as though any moment I would take my last breath.
Thoughts began racing excessively as the tears I shed were enough to soak a bath towel.
I referred to it as the dark night of the soul.
It seemed as if my soul had been highjacked yet there was nothing I could do but cry.
Over time, I had come to the truth that I was not the first or the last person to experience deep sorrow.
But at the time it I was certain no one else would ever understand. To make matter worse, I couldn’t find the words to explain my dilemma or to ask for help.
However the pride I carried wouldn’t allow me the freedom to reach out for help, but imprisoned me. I held the perception that I was strong enough and could handle anything, alone.
Holding the bag alone?
There are many reasons why people experience the pain of heart ache. Loosing a loved one, the ending of a relationship, a betrayal, or unfulfilled desires.
Most common, however, are unmet expectations.
Unmet expectations carry with it a level of frustration. Frustration comes from a lack of control concerning things we believed would bring a sense of fulfillment to our lives.
Feeling loss or pain is normal, but what you do with what you feel is important.
Instead of allowing pain to take root and further turn into bitterness or anger, give your heart and the cares of it to the Lord.
And be responsible for what you can control.
Do the work that’s necessary in order to release any false expectations and false perceptions held. Let go of how you believe the outcome of your situation should have manifested.
Refusing to let go of those beliefs cause you to become stuck in what doesn’t work, yet anxious to make is work. Anxiety opens the door to racing thoughts in the mind, and heaviness in the chest, as pressure builds to make a decision.
Any decision made during this time most likely will be made from the place of emotion. And the result of emotional decision most always brings you around full circle to repeat the cycle again.
Anxiety in a mans heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad. -Proverbs 12:25
Easier said than done is just an excuse for choosing to not do the work.
Sometimes a part of doing the work means letting go.
Letting go involves forgiving and that’s the whole point.
Forgiveness allows you the freedom to release the hurt.
Any attempts to justify yourself only make matters worse. Self justification creates more conflict than what was initially created.
However, the Lord promises to fight our battles but we must cast our cares on him. It’s in that process where we can allow healing to begin.
A healed heart now has more capacity to give and receive love.
Forgiveness increases that capacity.
Its Gods desire to heal every broken and disappointed place that hurts within the heart. We must ask God to create in us a clean heart and renew within us the right spirit.
Doing the work of forgiveness frees up space within our heart to experience the joy that was meant to flow through our lives.
“Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” –Luke 6:45
The things you allow the heart to meditate on are the same things that manifest to those around you.
Our thought life is a reflection of the meditations of the heart. Eventually what you meditate on will be the same things you talk about.
Those same meditations shape your perceptions of others, yourself, and your abilities. To meditate on what’s healthy and productive is one thing, but meditating on offenses only produce fear and anxiety.
What you refuse to confront will eventually confront you
When our hearts are wounded, issues which produce the conflict can plant seeds. If left unresolved, those seeds can grow into bitterness and anger. Those seeds have power to stop you from progressing in any area of life.
For instance a person riding a motorcycle wrecks, breaking both arms and legs.
The longer that individual neglects to receive appropriate medical care, the bones begin to heal incorrectly. Instead there will be reoccurring pain and misalignment of the body until seen by a physician.
Just as with the heart, any issue allowed to fester instead of being confronted will eventually confront you.
When the issue comes to confront you, it comes with reminders of what you should have done differently.
Here is where pride tightens its grip. It wants you to believe you can handle it alone and you’re in control. Meanwhile, pain intensifies as the broken record of defeat repeats itself.
The message of that record will cause you to feel as though you deserve to have your life in ruin and there’s no place to turn.
But the devil is a liar… Thats what he wants you to believe. Satan desires for you to remain hopeless and to blame God for what you’re experiencing.
He works overtime to steal your joy and cloud your vision so that you never hope to see the glory God has set before you.
The love of a lifetime
But God desires to heal every broken place by mending it with his love. His desire is that we delight ourselves in Him so He can position us to live from the places in life where our hearts will sing with joy.
He heals the broken hearted and binds up there’s wounds. -Psalms 147:3
We receive a new wisdom for how to handle our emotions, our thinking, and heals even the memory of what caused of pain. Sometimes that pain is the seed which births a desire to create a new beginning. It creates a burden in you to help others overcome the pain of a broken heart.
It’s no surprise to God that we would experience disappointments in life. The things which bring heart ache are the same things that God uses to bring us to the place that he had in mind for us. Seeking him. He uses our wounds to reveal purpose, shape our character, and to show his faithfulness towards us.
No matter how deep the pain, I want to encourage you to do the work necessary to allow the Lord to do his perfect work in you. No matter how many times you fall, get back up and dust yourself off and keep going.
Regardless of how long it may seem to take, keep moving. There will be times when you experience setbacks, but know it’s apart of the process. You will survive this and God is with you to see you through, every step of the way.
So shall the knowledge of wisdom be unto thy soul: when though hast found it, then there shall be a reward, and thy expectation shall not be cut off. -Proverbs 24:14
If you were encouraged by this post or know someone who will be, please share. Thank you and know that you are worthy!
Originally published at https://larissaslovenotes.com on July 31, 2020.
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